We went to the Santa Barbara Zoo today and took this photo. I am on the left side. I think it looks cool but my face is HUGE, especially my cheeks!! LOL Oh well.
So...for the past few weeks I have been experiencing a horrible pain underneath my right breast that shoots all the way through to the right side of my back. I thought it was my bra so I switched to a sports bra for awhile but the pain continued. Last night after some Jack in the box, I was so nauseated that I laid on the couch and breathed deeply for awhile. My cousin asked me if I was tired and I told her that I just felt sick. She then asked me where my pain was and I pointed and knowing I had been complaining about it for awhile she gave me a look and told me it was more than likely my gallbladder. I was taken aback by that, although with my size, I really shouldnt be. She just had her gallbladder removed last summer so she was all too familiar with the symptoms so I trusted what she was saying. I ran to my computer to look up the symptoms and sure enough I had about 8 of the ten of them. I am devastated. I know its a minor procedure and that I shouldnt be worried and its not really that I am even worried, its more of a shameful thing, like, how could I have done this to myself? My body has never been this big and I just kept eating, ignoring its warnings, ignoring its protests for healthier foods. I did this to myself and now because of it I have to have a part of me removed. It just bothers me. Bad. And it hurts to sit up for long periods of time now, especially if I eat anything so ironically I am trying to not eat anything. My insurance kicks in the first of May, so I am trying to hold on until I can see a doctor that will direct me towards the next step. This is a real wake up call for me.
On a happier note, things are looking up. I am making friends at work, and one of them even called me today, I was so excited. My job terrifies me each day that I go in, I seriously get nervous even just thinking about it, I almost go into a full blown attack. But it doesnt have to be forever, I just have to pay my dues and move on up and hopefully that will be sooner rather than later. I got my first paycheck, and my unemployment checks came through for those two weeks I was without money so that was really nice. My cousin is leaving Tuesday which sucks but I am glad she came. Also, my friend Kelly from my old job sent me a care package which was nice, it had a card and a BUNCH of Hello Kitty stuff in it!! :) I love stuff like that, it almost always makes me cry!
Ok Im off to read my new magazines I got today!
