Its sooo gorgeous outside!(the picture was taken at River Park here in town. Its pretty but the park scares the bejesus out of me because there are mountain lions!) Im so stoked. Im going to go walking. To rev myself up again, I am committing myself to 30 minutes of walking a day, 7 times a week. Thats better than nothing, yes yes? I just thought Id drop in and let you guys know whats up.
Im trying to make myself feel pretty. I respond to myself more when I find myself more appealing. For instance, I took my naturally curly hair today and straightened it and I immediately felt better about myself. A dab of make up and I was off...to the nearest Burger King. Yep, Reader, I felt so desirable that I felt like the king should witness it himself, lol. I didnt feel good about it, but I was starving. Anyways, that will be my last fast food binge. When my cousin gets here, she wants me on veggies and lean meats, which will be good. I dont eat veggies but she will be cooking them and making them so I will like how they taste so thats good. Im excited about that.
I came up with a new idea today. Ok, some of you might think this is lame but oh well. I spend a ton of money on junk food, whether it be fast food or the chips and dip or microwave pizza so I was thinking that from now on, I tally up the total of what those foods would cost me and put that money in a piggy bank or something and for a month, see how much I would have spent on that crap and with that money I can either treat myself to something nice or choose to keep it in the bank and add another month. Im excited for this plan because Im really curious to see how much I shell out for crap!! Isnt that a shame that the companies profited from my weight gain? Oh dont get me wrong, I know that I am ultimately responsible for what I do with my body but I cant stand it, they wave their fattening foods in our faces on a daily basis(I rhymed!) and yet the world hates fat people. Ugh. Can we say two faced?
I was talking to my cousin last night about how weight has controlled so much of my life and how I just wanted it to be done with, I just didnt want it to be that way, and move on. I told her how Im afraid to introduce myself to people because I immediately think they will dismiss me because of my size. She told me that even if they do, those are the people that I do NOT want in my life anyways. I agreed. But sooo much easier said than done.
I read this article in Oprah magazine--Im trying to find a way that you guys can read the article--and it was so interesting. This chic was trying to lose weight so this lady had her make out all these index cards that had reasons she wanted to lose weight so that when she felt like eating bad foods, she could pull out the cards and be reminded of why she shouldnt eat it. The lady also made her not eat ANYTHING between her breakfast and dinner, so she could learn to not be afraid of hunger. Im not doing a good job of describing this article, I know.
But check out these stories. http://www.oprah.com/beauty/fashion/beauty_fashion_200703_love_101.jhtml
Ok, I hope to be back later with some inspirational things for you.
